October 27, 2011 October 27, 2011

I tried going to a Mom & Tot group in a nearby town today. I didn’t really enjoy it. I don’t think they were really My People. But I have a tendency to do that, go somewhere, feel out-of-place because I always do, and then discount an activity when I really should give it a chance. So I might go back. But I might not.

One of the organizers of the group has a 3-year-old daughter (now known as OC “other child”) who took an immediate dislike to B. B was playing with toys and OC was hovering over her, glaring. B looked up and happily handed her the doll she was playing with and said “Here-u-go”. OC slapped the doll out of B’s hand. B just sat there looking stunned and holding her hand. Then a few minutes later B was picking up all the toys and putting them in the bin. OC noticed and came over and every time B put a toy in the bin OC grabbed it and hurled it across the room, glaring at B the whole time. I didn’t say anything to OC because if I had I would have burst into tears. I was tearing up as it was, although I am, admittedly, a little emotional these days (“a little emotional” is an understatement, I teared up at Taylor Swift’s ‘Romeo & Juliet’ on the radio the other day. Seriously. It’s bad.). I didn’t feel it was my place to correct someone else’s child, and I certainly wasn’t comfortable doing so in a room full of people I didn’t know. And no one else noticed what was going on. Instead I just cried on the way home.

If B and OC had been playing and a toddler tiff broke out and OC had slapped her hand, I wouldn’t have been too concerned. But OC was just being deliberately cruel. I know B will have to learn to deal with mean kids at some point, but I don’t think that it’s a requirement when she’s not quite 2 yet. She’s still so innocent* and I don’t want that to be squashed yet. I also don’t want her to learn that type of behaviour herself.

So. I’m going to have to figure out what’s best. Getting out of the house and around other people is good for both of us and it would be nice not to have to drive all the way into the city. But is hanging out with a group of people who I’m not sure I’m comfortable with, and that I’m not particularly thrilled with B being around good for both of us?

 

*innocent in most ways. We slaughtered our 4 turkeys a few weeks ago and I had to get B up from her nap while we were still processing them. She walked over, looked at the carcasses on the tailgate of the truck, declared “it’s dead” and wandered away to play. It was kind of surprising that she could apply that concept to them, although I’m sure she doesn’t actually comprehend what ‘dead’ means.

October 14, 2011 October 14, 2011

When I went to the clinic for the transfer I had to have a full bladder. I got there a bit early and they were running a bit behind so my bladder got very uncomfortably full. A nurse came and asked how I was doing and said that if I felt like I was going to pee on the chair that I could go to the bathroom and pee just a little. I told her I was more afraid of peeing on the doctor than on the chair and that yes, I would like to go just a bit. She handed me a very small paper cup and told me I could fill it twice. I somehow managed to do that and when I went for the transfer they still commented on my full bladder. I was very proud of my bladder control.

Apparently I do not have control when peeing on sticks. It took very little encouragement from James for me to take a test yesterday. 12dpo, evening urine and a very clear positive. Nothing faint about it. At the moment I am pregnant.

October 9, 2011 October 9, 2011

I’ve been to the coast for the transfer and am home. One Stage 3 Grade BB embryo on board. I’m not sure about classification, but I believe that’s good but not great embryo. Transfer went well, although my clinic kind of annoyed me. When I came out of the procedure room there was no one around, they’d apparently all gone on lunch break. No one told me if I should sit there for a few minutes, or just take off. I chose to sit in the recliner in one of the individual recovery areas and relax for about 20 minutes. I left the curtain open while I was there and no one came by during that time. It seemed kind of irresponsible. I had 3 3-day embryos defrosted and they transferred the best one. Before my transfer one of the nurses told me that both of the other embryos arrested, but the doctor said that one was still growing so they refroze it. I’ve never had issues with the clinic before this so maybe they were just having an off-day.

I’ll be testing next Sunday, a week from today, at 15dpo.

And Happy (Canadian) Thanksgiving! We’re having one of our farm-raised turkeys today.

October 3, 2011 October 3, 2011

I did decide to go ahead with an FET this cycle. B and I are flying out to the coast on Wednesday after the Farmers’ Market and the transfer is on Thursday. We’re going to stay out on the coast until Sunday morning.

I have my medications all sorted into one of those little plastic pill organizers but I’m not sure it’s enough. My prometrium from this morning is gone but I don’t remember taking it. I may have taken it orally instead of vaginally. I honestly have no idea what I did. It’s a little concerning.